Peer pressure of getting married and how to handle it

Peer pressure of getting married and how to handle it

If you are married, you know the pressure of marriage begins sometime in your mid twenties and peaks in your 30s. You all must have undergone this pressure from your family, relatives, friends and sometimes even random associations who don’t leave an opportunity to tell you how ‘this is the best time to marry’ or how ‘you should not wait any longer’. And sometimes the pressure gets so difficult to handle, it can lead to anxiety and even depression. But why do we have a timeline to marry at all?

In a society like ours, you are constantly going to be told by your friends and family how to love someone, how to handle relationships and when to get married. So when you feel peer pressure to get married, it’s because that’s more like a societal norm now. This can make it seem even more serious and scary at times. 29-year-old Farah shares, “My career is my top priority right now and it irks me to no ends when I am told I should get married. I keep telling everyone that my career is my priority and I don’t have time to date but the fact is that no boy seems to like me well enough to marry me. And those who like me do not match my criteria. It isn’t simple at all!”

Sometimes the pressure gets so intolerable, that some men or women rush into a relationship, just to regret it later – simply because they did not allow themselves time to really assess the future of the match. 31-year-old Shikha Patil shares, “I was dating this guy and having fun until my peers started forcing me to turn it into something serious. I wasn’t fully ready but I succumbed to the pressure. We got married within 7 months of knowing each other and got divorced shortly therafter.”

So what is the right approach? Ask yourself if you really want to tie the knot and if you’re ready to settle down. Be honest with yourself. Take into consideration all the factors and give yourself some time to figure things out. Be gentle with yourself and don’t feel any kind of pressure. If you’re scared of getting married or you’re feeling too overwhelmed, it’s alright. You’ve got all the time you want to decide when and if you wish to get married. Dr Prachi opines, “These pressures just kill the joy of relationships. I stopped learning how to enjoy my affairs and started focusing too heavily on who is marriage worthy. Or how soon will the boy propose marriage.”

Once you know how you feel, you will have a better idea bout what you wish to do. You’ll be in a good space of mind if you already know how your partner feels about getting married. If you don’t know how they feel, you can always talk about it. Either way, getting married should always be your decision to make and not someone else’s.


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